Seen here looking like he's about to die a second time after seeing what just came out of your butt, this is the resin Zombie Bathroom Break Toilet Paper Holder available from Design Toscano ($40). Of course with every ding-a-ling and their mother out there stockpiling toilet paper like they're trying to prove they'd be the first to die in an actual apocalypse (you'll never make it as a real doomsday prepper!), he may have to hang there empty-handed for awhile. Also, I'd argue they went a little too far with the blood splatter in the product photo. Nobody's bathroom looks like that except the very few people who have had diarrhea in the middle of the night and failed to find their toilet in the dark. *shrug* I just accepted I wasn't getting any of my security deposit back and moved.
Thanks again to hairless, who agrees when you're seriously shopping for $40 novelty toilet paper holders its time to take a step back and reevaluate your life.