Finally, A Decent Danny DeVito Face Fanny Pack, Complete With Hair

March 2, 2020

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This is the 'Fanny DeVito' fanny pack available for pre-order from The Cryptic Closet ($35, shipping in April). As you can see, it looks like Dan DeVito's face, complete with wispy hair on the sides. As far as fanny packs go, this is a great one, and I just bought two so I can wear one in the back AND front, that way I look fresh coming AND going. "What do you call a fanny pouch worn in the front?" A belly bag? "Penis pouch." Nobody calls them that, stop being nasty. "Look who's talking." *briefly stops trying to lasso ceiling fan blade with penis* I am the voice of reason.

Thanks to Jennifer M, who agrees they should have made it big enough to fit a rum ham.

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