Failure To Launch: Bottle Rocket Blastoff From Rump

November 13, 2019


This is a short video of a man who looks suspiciously like my buddy Ben having a bottle rocket with its guide stick between his buttcheeks prepared for liftoff (read: lit by a friend). Unfortunately for him, it fails to launch, presumably because somebody forgot to wipe earlier. "Sounds like you speak from experience, GW." *lifts back of shirt to reveal burn scars* "Jesus, how many times have you tried?!" You've heard of Helen of Troy, right? "The ass that failed to launch a thousand rockets." You're looking at it.

Keep going for the video.

Thanks to Pavel, who agrees this guy should have gone to Space Camp first.

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