What Are You?: Paris Zoo Unveils 'The Blob' Exhibit

October 18, 2019

The Paris Zoological Park is unveiling a new exhibit tomorrow -- The Blob. The blob is a unicellular organism (actually a species of slime mold) that looks like a fungus, but acts like an animal. Me? *shotguns two beers back-to-back, pukes a little* I always act like an animal.

[The blob] has no mouth, no stomach, no eyes, yet it can detect food and digest it.

The blob also has almost 720 sexes, can move without legs or wings and heals itself in two minutes if cut in half.

"The blob is a living being which belongs to one of nature's mysteries", said Bruno David, director of the Paris Museum of Natural History, of which the Zoological Park is part.

"It surprises us because it has no brain but is able to learn (...) and if you merge two blobs, the one that has learned will transmit its knowledge to the other," David added.

Whoa -- 720 sexes? That's like, almost quadruple the amount of sex I've had. I meant a quarter. Probably closer to a tenth. A hundredth? Heck, I'm having it right now. "Sex?" I think a stroke. Still, as far as zoo exhibits go, this does not sound like a very exciting one, but at least it's not gonna try throwing a handful of turd at you.

Keep going for a video about the blob, which is also capable of memory, learning, and maze solving, three things I'm terrible at.

Thanks to Ashley G and nib, who agree we're just one gene-splice away from a real life Venom.

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