Finally, Some Pizza Flavored Candy Canes

September 3, 2019


These are the pizza flavored candy canes just released by Archie McPhee. Six bucks will score you a box of six canes. Some more info while I sensually suck-sharpen a regular candy cane then try to break off the end in my coworker Greg's leg:

Delizioso! If you want pizza flavor, these candy canes deliver! (In 30 minutes or less.) A sure sign of the quality of these canes is the personified pizza slice on the package. Who wouldn't trust that face? This set of six candy canes is like a little slice of Italian-spiced heaven, allegedly cooked in a candy-fired oven by Sicilian elves.

But do they actually taste like pizza? Because pizza is a pretty complex taste. Like do they really capture the nuance of bubbling cheese intermingling with the sauce? Because my guess is no. "Rats." On a pizza?! Master Splinter would kill us. We'll have to eat them in secret.

Thanks to K Diddie, who agrees soon all foods will be available in candy cane form, marking the pinnacle of human achievement.

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