Real Products That Are About To Exist: Xbox Deodorant, Body Spray And Shower Gel

June 5, 2019


Because who doesn't want to smell like a gamer, Xbox and Unilever's Lynx brand in Australia and New Zealand are set to release a line of deodorant, body spray and shower gel. Some more info while I just rub myself with my car's pine tree air freshener like a normal person:

"Lynx Xbox is a fresh scent of pulsing green citrus, featuring top notes of kaffir lime and winter lemon, aromatic herbal middle notes of mint and sage, and woody bottom notes of patchouli and clearwood. Containing a range of natural essential oils, the Xbox Lynx range comes with a sleek new look and features a body spray, deodorant, and shower gel."

Xbox ANZ boss Tania Chee said in a statement that users can spray or wash themselves with Xbox Lynx to "power up" before heading out the door in the morning.

Hmm, not what I was expecting. Of course I don't know what I was expecting besides these products to never exist. Yet here we are. "Mountain Dew and Doritos scented or GTFO." What about Cheetos? "Only if Doritos refuses to collab." Your heart is in the right place, I can tell.

Thanks to Jody, who informed me he doesn't care what body product you choose to use, just as long as you're using something.

  • pojojuniper

    What does "pulsing" green citrus smell like? Why is the lime pulsing? Is there something living inside it? Can you actually smell the pulsation or is it more of a sensation? So many questions...

  • Douchy McDouche

    This product is an oxymoron. Everybody knows gamers don't shower or use deodorant.

  • Colin Lang

    Or leave the house... seriously they go downstairs to their mom's basement, to their little cave. Who do they need to smell good for? The spiders and termites?

    On the other hand if anyone needs a product like this, it's definitely gamers.

  • Deksam

    X-box smells huh?...

  • Munihausen

    The deodorant, sure. Soap? Nahsomuch.

  • The Continental

    It smells like Totinos Pizza Rolls.

    ....and shame.

  • sizzlepants

    Can't smell worse than Axe.

  • Bling Nye

    I thought for sure it was going to smell like dusty hot electronics.

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