Real Products That Exist: The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Shredder Cheese Shredder

April 4, 2019

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Because apparently there's a market for everything, this is the $22 officially licensed (I wouldn't have bothered and just called it the samurai cheese shredder) stainless steel Shredder Shredder. The ridiculous product info:

Call this The Shredder. Features a classic stainless steel box cheese grater design with a handle in the shape of the vilainous Shredder from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies and cartoon series!


Like the evil Tinhead himself, this will shred, grate and slice in a variety of ways!

Shred like a ninja! Perfect for cheese, vegetables, ginger, potatoes and more!

Makes a 'grate' gift for TMNT fans who want to impress in the kitchen.

As far as product designs go, this one is pretty poor. I actually took the time to carefully reverse engineer this model, and it turns out it's just a regular $6 cheese grater with a head stuck on top. Imagine my shock and disbelief! I was so outraged I shredded cheese until my knuckles were bloody. Sucks too because I was supposed to go swimming with sharks later and I don't want to have to fight them. "GW? You really are the dumbest person I know." I'm also the only person you really know, because I wear my heart on my sleeve. I mean this is a tanktop, but normally it's there.

Keep going for a couple more product shots.

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Thanks to carey, who can't wait for the electric Super Shredder version.

  • GeneralDisorder

    Does anyone remember that one episode of TMNT from the 90s where they hypnotize Shredder into thinking he's a ninja turtle and his transition word was shredder and they went to some kind of food factory and he says to himself "there's still some cheese on this shredder"....

    Memories are fucking weird.

    In case anyone thinks that episode never happened:
    https://youtu.be/PDJ1b3JQlO4

  • This seems very much like the "better mousetrap" that catches zero mice but somehow manages to snap shut on your ballsack every time you walk by it.

  • Richard H Sanford

    Who TF holds a cheese grater like that?

  • GeneralDisorder

    Hand models don't know hot to do things...

  • scott19

    Someone who knows I love sliced thumbprints in my cheese!

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