Real Products That Exist: The Cheeseburger Wallet

April 11, 2019


This is the Deliciousness Burger Wallet available from Toddland. The $30 printed polyurethane wallet looks like a cheeseburger, and even has a little foam padding in the bun to give it some depth. But don't worry, because "when you put it in your pocket the foam will smash down so it's totally workable." Well that's a relief, but I don't even carry a wallet. "Because you lost it?" My whole life was in that thing! FUN FACT: One night I thought I'd lost my wallet at a bar until I realized I'd just jammed it between my butt cheek and underwear trying to put it away. "You need help." I don't need help, I need someone to do it all for me.

Keep going for a couple more product shots while I ask Jimmy Buffet what he thinks of it.



Thanks to Robbie, who's holding out for a club sandwich wallet. Mmmm, nice choice.

  • The_Wretched

    Very presidential.

  • MustacheHam

    This is a pretty cool design.

  • Douchy McDouche

    OMG! Finally something classy enough to replace my "bad motherfucker" Pulp Fiction wallet.

  • GeneralDisorder

    PFFT! This is amateur shit. Real wallet pros carry a wallet that looks like a gun. You want traffic stops to be extra fun, don't you?

  • TwiZtedS

    They're sure proud of their brand Toddland, they have it embroidered on the front, a sewn on tag on the inside as well as a BIG ol' sticker, then again across the inside seam for good measure. Then again if you count the one on the "Tip" card (because math is hard)...

  • Jenness

    No kidding, unless your name is Todd it would just appear as if you had a crush on a really fat burger obsessed dude named Todd.

  • Bling Nye

    TIL that GW wears underwear. I'm so disillusioned now.

  • Wooder

    This is the type of cheap wallet that leaves die stains on your pants/leg/money and GOD Forbid if this went through the wash!

    "Honey you have something brown and green running down your leg..." ...."OMG not again"

  • digidude

    There's a joke about "cheddar" in here somewhere.

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  • digidude

    No you don't.

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