*spitting out on keyboard* This isn't an energy bar!
This is Pull Start Fire, a little box that you pile firewood around, then pull its string to start a fire. The boxes allegedly work in 200+MPH winds (in which case you've got bigger problems, i.e. standing, not going back to Oz), rain and snow, with wet wood (since the boxes burn for over thirty minutes), and burn twice as hot as other fire-starters (dragons excluded). A pack of three will set you back around $18 and make the perfect gift for the arsonist in your life. Obviously, I plan on removing the packaging then telling my roommate it's a pull-string noisemaker. Which it kind of is, they'll just be screams.
Keep going for a couple more shots and a video demonstration while I see if anybody in the office wants to play hot potato.
Thanks to Jacques, who agrees there are very few problems a roaring fire can't solve.