Life Skills: 1-Year Old Eating Pizza In His Sleep

January 23, 2019

sleepy-pizza.jpg

Seen here proving you're never too young to master lifelong skills, this is a short video of 1-year old MJ eating pizza while he's almost asleep. Mmmm, pizza and sleep: two of my favorite things (although I have ordered pizza so sleepy before that I didn't hear the doorbell and was banned from ever ordering from those particular pizzerias again). Also, where did he get that rubber bib, because I could use one of those. I always take a few of the cheap plastic ones with a lobster printed on the front whenever my parents take me out to eat at a seafood restaurant, but, just like every romantic relationship I've ever been in, those things are not meant to last. "Who wants to date a guy who doesn't answer the phone when his girlfriend calls?" Who wants to date a girl who's trying to infect her boyfriend with ear cancer all day long?! "Neglecter!" Mad doctor! *throw ourselves at each other amorously, make out super hot and heavy*

Keep going for the video.

Thanks to hairless, who agrees pizza and sleep are proof there's at least some decency in the universe.

  • Closet Nerd

    This kid is gonna go places in life

  • Douchy McDouche

    That's a pretty accurate depiction of me at 3am every saturday.

  • GeneralDisorder

    That bib looks like a doll bib. I didn't know anyone made hard plastic bibs. Poor kid.

  • Bling Nye

    It's actually a pretty soft/flexible silicone.

  • GeneralDisorder

    Hmm... like a sex toy. Got it.

  • Big Dog on Krampus

    the longer video will show the kid binge drinking

  • Corky McButterpants

    Oh look! Clickbait McJournalism.

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