Finally, A Decent Pizza Cutter/Fork Combo Utensil

January 22, 2019


Because there's no such thing as too many novelty pizza gadgets, this is the $13 pizza cutter/fork hybrid utensil. The pizza cork (pizza futter?) allows a user to effortlessly cut pizza into bite-size pieces with the wheel blade, then shovel it down their gullet with the fork. Alternatively, just eat the pizza folded up in paper plate like a normal person who only takes four minutes to eat dinner so they can get back to playing video games. And by video games I mean love games. And by love games *setting down controller* I mean your heart is mine now.

Thanks again to Closet Nerd, who agrees Hot Pockets are hassle free except for setting your mouth on fire.

  • This looks like it's designed to slice your face off whilst trying to eat.

  • Wild Man of Wongo

    Is there a word for things that seem specifically designed just to eventually take up space in a landfill? Somebody needs to come up with something catchy.

  • Jenness

    I'd still manage to slice off a fingertip on this thing.

    *whispers 'and sue'*

  • Bling Nye

    Next time someone challenges me to a duel to the death, I'm picking these fuckin' things.

  • The_Wretched

    How does it handle anchovy, black olive, and pineapple pizza (without the red sauce)? Cause that's what I like to eat.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I've only eaten anchovie pizza one time and it was phenomenal. Granted, I was extremely high so that could have been directly related.

  • Wilf Smith

    The only time I've tried anchovy pizza, all I could taste was overwhelming salt. Couldn't taste anything else. I put it down to being an acquired taste.

  • The_Wretched

    Recent years has seen the rise of products that I can only wish are inflicted on their creators. part II

  • TyDurd

    Ok, put a fork on a soup ladle while you're at it.

  • Frédéric Purenne

    Okay for the slicer, but why the fork? It's a pizza... use your hands like civilized people.

  • GeneralDisorder

    The worst part about this design is that the fork inteferes with the operation of the pizza cutter. How stupid can you get?

  • Closet Nerd

    Can also be used as a makeshift catapult to fling the stupid olive Bertucci's puts in the middle of every pizza....

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