Real Products That Exist: A USB Chargeable Corgi Butt Heated Seat Pillow

November 9, 2018

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This is the $25 Corgi Butt Heated Pillow. It's charged via USB, heats for 4 - 6 hours on a charge, and takes 1 - 2 hours to recharge. You do the math. "I sit directly under an air conditioning vent at work." Same here. But you know what I did? "Bought a corgi butt heated pillow?" What? No. I came into the office on a weekend and crawled through the ventilation system and sealed the duct above my cubicle with expanding foam insulation. "Nice, how'd that work out?" Somehow I started a fire. "Oh dear." Plus I fell through the ceiling into the conference room. Thankfully this office doesn't have any security cameras. *gets call from HR* Okay apparently they're just well hidden.

Keep going for a couple more shots. FIRE SAFETY TIP: Don't fart into it.

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Thanks to Rich, who agrees lowering your sperm-count is all the rage these days.

  • Frédéric Purenne

    Wait, I feel we've skipped many steps here:
    - How are Corgis' butt an aesthetic?
    - When did butt warmer became a thing?
    - Why would I want my butt to touch another bu-... skip that last one, I hadn't thought that one through before typing.

  • GeneralDisorder

    "When did butt warmer became a thing?"

    My ex wife owns a 2000 GMC Yukon XL with butt warmers in the front seats.

  • Megatron Jenkins

    And that's the best damn feature in any new car!

  • Jenness

    Can you please explain your "thinking that one through" on that last one for me? *put head on palms and listens intently*

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