This is a video of Scooter the 47-year old African Grey parrot cruising around on a little R/C truck. Some more info from Scooter's caretaker while I try to fly a tiny R/C drone inside the snack machine and knock some Doritos and Sun Chips loose. Ooooor get my drone stuck and have to buy like four bucks worth of Ruffles to get it back:
"Scooter is a 47-year-old African Gray who was injured when young and can't fly. We got her from a loving owner who couldn't give her the attention and care she needs about 4 years ago. It took time and love but now we can hold her and come to find out, she may not fly but loves to ride anything. She has a boat and truck we have modified to be safe for her and she loves to ride."
She has a truck AND a boat? Wow. I never thought I'd be jealous of an African Grey parrot that can't fly, yet here we are. Add a plane, helicopter and submarine to her fleet and she'll officially be living the billionaire lifestyle. Me? *putting on broken Ray-Ban knock-offs* I'm living the nillionaire lifestyle. "What happened to your other sock?" A rat tried fighting me for it. "And?" And won, obviously.
Keep going for the whole video.
Thanks to Christina D, who agrees Scooter should get a little electric mobility scooter she can steer.