This is a video of the San Bernardino Police Department of California using a bag of loose Doritos to lure an escaped pig named Smalls back home. In their own words while I get my arm stuck in the vending machine again. And for the record, I paid, the chips just didn't drop (I didn't pay):
Highland Station received a call reference a pig "the size of a mini horse" 🐷🐴 running around the neighborhood. Deputy Ponce and Deputy Berg found him and due to previous calls, knew where he lived. They lured him back home with @Doritos one of our deputies had in her lunch bag 😋. They made a trail and he followed. "We were able to put him back in and secure the gate. It was fun!" said Deputy Ponce.
Crime fighting to safely securing a mini horse sized pig, we do it all
Some news outlets are reporting they used Poppin' Jalapeno flavored Doritos, which doesn't make any since because Cool Ranch is obviously the superior flavor. "I prefer--" I'm sorry, did you see a podium? "No..." Then I guess it's not up for debate, is it?
Keep going for a short news report which includes a reporter who clearly doesn't know how large domestic pigs grow and thinks they're all Wilbur/Babe sized.
Thanks to K Diddie, who agrees with me on the Cool Ranch thing.