'Critical Failure' D20 Dice With The F-Word Instead Of A 1

October 10, 2018


Because rolling a 1 is usually bad news, these are the Critical Failure D20 dice made and sold by Etsy seller MarsDice. The 25mm dice have 'F*CK' printed on the side instead of a '1', are available with a silver or gold finish (along with either black or uncolored numbers/letters), and cost $18 apiece. Man, I still remember the first time playing D&D that I rolled a 1 and got my bard character boned by a goblin. "You were begging for that 1." *shrug* I'm an adventurous spirit.

Keep going for a handful more shots.





Thanks to carey, who agrees the 20s should be replaced with 'F*CK YEAH's.

  • KingCraigers

    Didn't even read the article and I instantly went to the link to buy it. It'll be here by the end of the month.

  • sizzlepants

    Not sure about this. In my experience rolling a 1 usually generates the most entertaining results. Sure it's a critical failure, but if forces an unexpected result, it only has to suck if you have a bad DM.

  • Bling Nye

    Our house rule is if you roll a natural 1, you have to roll again to confirm; 11 or higher is a "good" failure (i.e., you swing your sword and lose your grip, having it fall in an adjacent random square), 10 or less is a "bad" failure (i.e., you swing your sword and lose your grip, having it fall 10-15 feet/2-3 squares away in a random direction OR cut yourself taking 1d6 damge)... if you roll a 20, you negate the failure but still miss and effectively end your turn. If you roll a 1 to confirm you get the same "good/bad failure" split but worse (often combining or compounding, so you might chuck your sword AND take damage), and roll again.... and if you roll a 1 a THIRD time (no other number matters on this third roll), your character spontaneously dies (ie, you swing your sword but stumble and manage to fall face first on your sword).

    Works the other way too with natural 20's if you roll 3 in a row your character gets a wish spell.

    In 15 years of pretty regular bi-weekly campaigning with the same group of people, we've had the spontaneous death happen twice (coincidentally to the same player) and the spontaneous wish happen once (coincidentally to a guest player, who used the wish to turn their character into a bronze dragon that flew off at the end of the session).

  • Noam

    Then again, I always bought new dice last week.

  • GeneralDisorder

    Well fuck.

  • Eric Ord

    ...do you have to actually fuck, or?

  • TheQiwiMan

    I don't see no question mark, therefore tis not a request, but a demand.

  • TheQiwiMan

    So you're saying I have a 1 in 20 chance to fuck?

    *puts on sunglasses*

    I like those odds.

  • Jenness

    *blows on the dice and makes a wish for it to be tentacle sex*

  • TheQiwiMan


  • Blart2D2

    Son of a bitch I just bought a new metal D20 last week.

  • Frédéric Purenne

    Then again, I always bought new dice last week.

blog comments powered by Disqus
Previous Post
Next Post