Real Products That Exist: Infinity Gauntlet House Slippers

August 15, 2018

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Sorry folks I had to deal with some surprise stuff yesterday, and it sucked. I'm back now and ready to hold hands and skip through a meadow like the carefree, happy-go-lucky children that we are. These are the officially licensed Avengers: No Infinity Stone Unturned Thanos Slippers available for preorder from Merchoid ($17, shipping in December). Obviously, they're perfect for the Avengers fan who doesn't want to wear/masturbate with a heavy gauntlet but enjoys padding around the house in a pair of comfy slippers. I'm gonna be honest: I'm a sucker for slippers. I'm also a sucker for laying in front of the fireplace with someone special ...our bodies glistening in the firelight...eating chocolate covered strawberries from each other's lips and, well -- you know. "Waiting for Santa?" We're gonna catch that fat bastard this year.

Thanks to carey, who agrees slippers are one of life's simple pleasures. It's like I feel like a king even though I'm super poor.

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