Jerks Steal Shark From Aquarium By Disguising It In Baby Stroller

August 2, 2018

shark-thieves.jpg

This is some security cam footage of a group of humanoid turds stealing a small horn shark named Miss Helen from a petting pool at the San Antonio Aquarium in Texas by disguising it in a baby stroller. Apparently one of the men had previously owned the same type of shark but it passed so he just decided to steal another one because trash people beget trash ideas. You shouldn't even be allowed to own a fishbowl.

The video shows the thieves staking out the petting pool for over an hour, waiting for the staff to leave the room. While aquarium staff are distracted by an accomplice, another of the suspects reaches into the pool and grabs something with a net.


According to the aquarium, the trio then placed the shark into a bucket, covered it with a wet blanket, and pushed it away in a children's stroller.

One man has been charged after confessing to the theft and two other individuals have charges pending. Police believe that the shark was not kidnapped for profit, but to be added to the suspects' extensive private collection of marine life.

"The arresting officer said that the suspect had one of these sharks but lost it and wanted another one"

Thank God they were busted and the shark safely returned to the aquarium. WTF is wrong with people? Now I'm not saying these three should all be sentenced to being fed to hungry great whites on live television, but you have to admit that would make a pretty epic finale to next year's Shark Week. I'll start drafting a petition to Congress.

Keep going for the video footage (complete with the shark's return) while I speculate how many times these idiots watched Ocean's 11 hoping to gain some shark-stealing insight.

Thanks to my friend Arlene, who agrees hopefully they just bought (but probably stole) that stroller and haven't actually procreated.

  • CrazyUncleNicola

    How did he get one in the first place, Id assume he could do what he did the first time, but maybe he stole that one too

  • GeneralDisorder

    /r/unethicallifeprotips Remember... It's a lot easier to steal shit with a baby stroller.

  • kLRKROD

    Of course these ppl are from Texas. True fact. In Texas, there are more Tigers in Texas than all of the world.

  • Jenness

    There are also entire herds of animals that went extinct in their native lands like the Iscimitar-horned oryx (extinct in Africa since the 80's), the dama gazelle, addax but are thriving in Texas exotic game ranches where wealthy hunters pay game wardens, wildlife & fishery experts who protect the flora and fauna to save the species and pay upwards of 100k for the 'tag' right to shoot one once it's time to cull the herd. Heck, the desert bighorn sheep hunt tags in Colorado and Nevada can go even higher - and that money goes into medicines, forestry saving, to keep the herds healthy and protected.

    Too bad "activists" would rather they die off and be extinct and have become completely uneducated about the delicate balance between civilization and wildlife and what it actually takes to save species. They don't understand the reality of the world, other country governments and that if a tiger who eats a villager will be killed along with all the other tigers because they are considered pests who murder your kids - not wild 'pets'.

  • TheQiwiMan

    Just when I thought I couldn’t love you more, you show an understanding of how the Private Sector protects animals infinitely better than government regulations.
    Marry me plz?

  • Mr Coco

    something tells me they weren't environmentalist trying to set it free.

  • TheQiwiMan

    Was that “something” the article that explained how the guy was stealing it to add to his collection?

  • PUNX

    so this is where I live and reports say that he put it up on for sale for $300. Also that he states he was saving it. that the aquarium has allot of the animals die. he pretended to be one of he salt distributors employees and needed to check the water like a wk or 2 before this was disgusted by what he say behind their closed doors. He said he saved that one because it looking distressed from all the people petting it

  • Sean Cochrane

    Yeah. The people the run both the SA and Austin aquariums are trash people. People don't realize that those aquariums are not run by people who care for animals and want to keep them safe; they're only concerned with money and those aquarium conditions are horrible.

  • Fnnurggg

    If there are issues with how the animals are being kept, they should have gone to the authorities, contact animal welfare services or called in the media. Two wrongs don't make a right. Plus, if he wanted to save it, why put it up for sale?

  • TheQiwiMan

    Garbage gunna garb.

  • steve holt

    Yo FAM! I saw an earlier post that you thought I was dissing you. I was not! I would never do that to the QiwiMan!

  • TheQiwiMan

    Huh? You did? I did?

  • Munihausen

    That guy is going to have a whale of a problem once he gets before the judge.

  • steve holt

    I can envision him PERCHED before the judge, waiting for the verdict.

  • steve holt

    yeah, he's really gonna flounder in court.

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