Timelapse Of A Corpse Flower Blooming

July 9, 2018

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This is a timelapse of a corpse flower blooming (given its name because its bloom smells like a rotting corpse to attract pollinators) at the New York Botanical Garden, before eventually collapsing like an exhausted boner. It's a shame we don't have Smell-O-Vision. It takes approximately seven years for a corpse flower to bloom for the first time, then anywhere between two and ten to bloom again. In this video, the multi-day blooming process was condensed down to a single minute, or approximately four times the average adult's attention span. You know, I actually got to go see a corpse flower in bloom in one of the greenhouses at Virginia Tech during my time there. It really did stink. Of course there's also the very real possibility that blooming corpse flowers don't actually smell at all, and it's just a hoax perpetuated by horticulturalists so they can stand around farting to their hearts' content and laughing at everybody huffing whatever they ate for lunch. "I doubt that." Horticulturalists are weird though.

Keep going for the video.

Thanks to K Diddie, who agrees it's always smart to bury the body near a blooming corpse flower.

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