Good To Know: German Firefighters Trained To Deal With Adult Toy Emergencies

May 22, 2018


(above) I'm not sure what I'm looking at but I want no part of it.

Firefighters in Germany are now being trained to deal with sex toy emergencies (I need a dildo, STAT!), due to a recent spike in people getting their penises stuck in things, and things stuck in their butts. *shrug* It happens. Just stay calm, it'll come out eventually -- that's my motto.

Emergency crews are being drilled in cutting off penis rings or extracting items that have got stuck in hard to reach places.

The seminar is called Maschinenunfaelle in German, which translates to 'Mechanical Failures'.

More than 600 firefighters were given a lesson in how to remove penis rings, in Dresden this week.

The 15-minute rescue technique involves inserting a spatula between the victim's penis and the ring before it is cut off with a grinder.

Man, I'm not sure I'd feel all that comfortable with nothing between my penis and a grinder but a spatula. Could you even imagine being the person sitting there while firefighters grind away a ring just millimeters from you penis? That'll make you think twice before getting kinky again. "Would it though?" Absolutely not, let's move to Germany.

Thanks to K Diddie, who agrees you should definitely try using all the butter in your fridge before calling the fire department (two sticks usually does the trick).

Previous Post
Next Post