Flat-Earther Successfully Launched Himself 1,800 Feet Into The Sky With Steam-Powered Rocket, Discovers No Flat-Earth Evidence

March 26, 2018


Flat-earther "Mad" Mike Hughes successfully launched himself 1,875 feet into the wild blue yonder over the weekend (from a launchpad repurposed from an old mobile home) hoping to gather evidence that the earth is a flat disk (previously: . Unfortunately for him, he was only able to gather evidence about how much it hurts to crash back down to earth in a homemade rocket.

"I'm tired of people saying I chickened out and didn't build a rocket. I'm tired of that stuff. I manned up and did it."

Hughes reached a speed...estimated to be around 350 mph before pulling his parachute. Hughes was dropping too fast, though, and he had to deploy a second one. He landed with a thud and the rocket's nose broke in two places like it was designed to do.

"This thing wants to kill you 10 different ways," said Hughes, who had an altimeter in his cockpit to measure his altitude. "This thing will kill you in a heartbeat."

"Am I glad I did it? Yeah. I guess. I'll feel it in the morning. I won't be able to get out of bed. At least I can go home and have dinner and see my cats tonight."

Admittedly, I have to respect Mike's willingness to strap himself into a death trap and blast off to capture a view of the earth that nobody who hasn't ridden an airplane for the first minute of it's ascent has ever seen. His next plan is to develop a 'Rockoon,' a "rocket that is carried into the atmosphere by a gas-filled balloon, then separated from the balloon and lit," which could IN THEORY travel as high as 68 miles. Will he be able to go home and have dinner and see his cats the night after that flight? That remains to be seen (he's definitely gonna die).

Keep going for a video of the launch.

Thanks to K Diddie, Alex and n0nentity, who agree there's nothing trying hard and believing in yourself can't achieve except for the things you aren't actually capable of.

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