Maybe The Universe Is Trying To Tell You Something: Front Porch Package Thief Receives Instant Karma

January 29, 2018


This is a video of a worthless excuse for a human attempting to steal three UPS packages off somebody's front porch, all captured by the homeowner's Nest home security camera. Almost immediately after picking up the packages she slips and...I don't think ankles are supposed to bend that way (make sure you have the volume on to hear the agony). The getaway driver, who apparently decided to disguise himself as a very unconvincing Seattle Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson, manages to carry his dearly beloathed back to the car before coming back for the packages himself. When reached for comment about the incident, the real Russell Wilson said he'd really wished they'd been Cowboys or Patriots fans instead. Also, to call around to all the local clinics to see if any of them have reported a human shaped turd admitted with a broken ankle.

Keep going for the whole video. Heist of the century (aka Ocean's Two) starts right around the minute mark.

Thanks to Dave L, who agrees there's a special place in hell for package thieves, and it's full of clamshell packaging and paper cuts.

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