This is the watermelon that was meticulously carved into an expanding, hanging lantern by a Chinese artisan. Most impressive. And here I thought being able to spit a watermelon seed over twelve feet was impressive. FUN FACT: Did you know the record for watermelon seed spitting is 68 feet 9 and 1/8 inches? That's true. That's also more than 2/3rds the way across a basketball court. The only way I could spit a watermelon seed that far is if I'm choking on one and somebody gives me the Heimlich standing on the edge of a cliff with a strong tailwind.
Thanks to Jody, who agrees the best lantern is the electric one you use to read comic books/nudie mags with in the blanket fort you made after your parents send you to bed without dessert because you didn't eat all your vegetables.