Summer Blockbusters: 8-Minute Battle Between Convenience Store Clerk And Two Would-Be Robbers

September 5, 2017


Note: Watch with volume, solid soundtrack.

This is the security cam footage from a convenience store in Calgary, Alberta, Canada, of a clerk doing battle with two would-be robbers. They come for cigarettes and lotto scratchers, they leave with bruises. One brandishes a small pickaxe before the clerk wrestles it away and rips his mask off. The other, a female, produces what appears to be lipstick but could be a small pistol although I doubt it. She then tries to mace the clerk but doesn't know how to operate the can. They continue to scuffle, swinging various objects at each other including a tire iron and bong, before the clerk retreats outside and, unbeknownst to the robbers, proceeds to block the doors with a bench and set up a tactical defense from which he lobs giant bottles of antifreeze at the thieves as they try to escape through the shattered doors, scoring several direct hits. Eventually, the robbers do make it out of the store, although the male was apprehended on the scene because the clerk and a good samaritan caught him and restrained him until police arrived. The female was caught just a few blocks away. And, as much as I hate to admit it because I really did enjoy all the movies, it was still a better love story than Twilight.

Keep going for the video and watch all eight minutes straight through, it really is action-packed.

Thanks to Closet Nerd, for reminding me heroes are everywhere.

  • DFCtomm

    the question that has always been at the front of everybody's mind. Bong vs. tempered glass door, who wins? @5:20 it gets answered

  • DFCtomm

    They're stealing the bongs, of course

  • Georgia

    Wow. What a roller coaster! Gotta say, those 8 minutes really made me proud to be Canadian.

    I loved everything about it. I loved the shittiness of the robbers (seriously, they just dumped all their loot into a garbage can that they planned to carry around with them as they ran away?). I loved the not-taking-any-shittiness of the clerk, who I'm pretty sure has been training for this by watching Home Alone 27 times. And I loved the gunlessness of it all. Tire irons and anti-freeze? Yes, this is the Canada I know.

    This security footage could go to festivals.

  • Bling Nye

    I didn't watch with audio, I can only assume there were repeated "soory, soory, eh" exchanges during the scuffle?

  • sizzlepants

    Probably but the audio is pretty much just hardcore drums. Security camera doesn't normally pick up actual audio,

    Also really like how Good Samaritan's first anti-freeze shot is a direct hit on the male. Knocks him right back off camera hahaha

  • n_a_a_s

    Closet posted this??

    shittiest robbers ever flee slowest police response

  • Closet Nerd

    Yes sir!
    .....just sayin

  • Irina Abramovich

    Closet Nerd:

    I heard afterooster's wife is so fat she once tried to eat a house because it was decorated with yummy Thanksgiving decorations like pumpkins and leaves and Thanksgiving turkeys!!! Afterward she ate all of Domino's pizza advertisements from the mail because they are so yummy! She has to lose 1, 000 pounds before she can fit inside a restaurant booth! It's fun to watch her eat according to afterooster because she also eats the takeout containers after covering them in dressing like on a salad and afterooster has sex with her after and she has the smell of buttered popcorn on her breath!!!=)

    <3 Thomas

    Hubree: You are the best kitten baby known on all of God's white world! Your green eyes area Godly!=)=)=)
    Irina: I heard you like Nerds candy A LOT! Me too. =)=)

  • TheQiwiMan

    Damn this got my heart pounding way more than any blockbuster movies' fight scenes ever did!

    Now I need to try to google and see if I can find out what happened to the idiot robbers in the post-credits scene..

  • TheQiwiMan

    More info. The "Good Samaritan" was a friend of his who worked at another nearby convenience store.

  • Doog

    Thank you! I was really curious behind the motivation of this character. I felt they did a great job of fleshing out the other character's stories, but 'Good Samaritan' got very little screen time and almost no attention despite being one of the best parts of the movie.

    I really hope they don't screw up the sequel as they always do. It'll probably be based in America, involve guns, and last about a quarter as long, which I suppose could be cool if they throw in a Michael Bay-esque explosion and a sweet twist, like robber betrayal inside the convenience store.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I feel like rule 0 of robbery is "don't fuck with old people". The older the clerk the more likely they are to fight you over a few dollars.

  • Bling Nye

    100% true, friend in his 20's worked as a clerk, got robbed was like take everything, this is a shit job. Called the cops when he could, but fuck getting injured/killed over a few hundred bucks.

  • Bling Nye

    I'm not sure what I enjoyed more, the incompetence of the robbers, or the competence of the clerk.

  • Irina Abramovich

    Bling Nye:

    Here I am logging into my other account, under a disguised name, to write about how fat afterooster's wife is:

    I heard afterooster's wife is so fat she once tried to fill a swimming pool with olive oil to swim in it! Afterward, she threw into the swimming pool shrimps and let them cook under the hot sun and then ate all 5,000,000 of them!=) If afterooster's wife lost 500 pounds she would be eligible for drinking grapeseed oil- she is also over the limit to drive a car and has to travel by a blimpie!=)

    <3 Thomas

    Hubree: You are the cutest kitten in the world! Let's be soul mates forever!=)=)=)
    Irina: Lets go to the arcade sometime soon!=)

  • Adibobea9

    As much time as the robbers wasted and as much time as the clerk saved, I'm surprised how long it took for the police to arrive. I'm assuming they caught them via the camera footage if they weren't able to get them on foot…

  • Bling Nye

    Less than 8 minute response time, I didn't think that was too bad actually. I don't know at what point the cops were called though, actual response time may have been faster than it appeared. And they were caught, the guy at the scene, the girl a couple blocks away, according to the linked article.

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