This is a local news story about Ross Township, Pennsylvanian Jerry Lynn and the alarm clock that's been going off inside his living room wall every day for 13 years. It's not a very chill alarm either. I'm....pretty sure I would have burned the house to the ground 12 years and 11 months and 29 days ago.
Jim says he dropped the clock, tied to a string, through an air vent. Set to go off ten minutes later, it would let him know where to punch a hole in the living room wall to pass a wire through for a TV hookup.
"As I was laying it down, all of a sudden I heard it go 'thunk!' as it came loose," he said. "I thought, well, that's not a real problem. You know it's still going to go off. And it did."
So why didn't you ever knock a hole in the wall and retrieve it? Were you trying to make yourself go crazy, because I feel like that would work. I imagine they probably just told themselves the batteries were about to die anyways, so why bother. 13 years later, here we are. I'm one of the world's laziest people but I would have ninja kicked a hole in that wall and broken the alarm clock over my knee by day two. Then left a gaping hole in the wall, because I'm lazy. Eventually, my roommate will cover it with a poster like the rest of the holes I've ninja kicked through our walls.
Keep going for the news report.
Thanks to Lyndsey, who agrees those must have been some sort of secret prototype Energizer batteries that never die. Or this is all a lie.