A Milan, Italy Hotel With $224,000 24 Carat Gold Bed Sheets

June 16, 2017


The TownHouse Galleria Milano is offering guests the opportunity to stay overnight in their Seven Stars Ottagono Presidential Suite in a bed covered with 24 carat gold sheets. For reference, that is 24 more carats than my bedsheets, which I'm fairly certain are made out of asbestos. At least they won't melt to me in a fire and make me look like one of Goldfinger's victims.

The extravagance includes one bottom sheet, four pillowcases, and one duvet cover with guaranteed authenticity. Those Gold Sheets powerfully represent vitality, courage, and willpower, and most of all, they magnify positive feelings. Apart from being a symbol of wealth and royalty, it also stimulates wisdom and desire for knowledge.

Really, so these sheets allegedly "stimulate wisdom and desire for knowledge?" That sounds pretty far fetched to me. Also they "magnify positive feelings?" I'm sorry, but if I have the money to stay in a presidential suite with $224,000 bed sheets, my positive feelings are already at max. Asking for any more would just be greedy. So...how much do you think it costs to stay here a night? I'm asking for a friend who hopes it's less than the $224,000 bed sheets he's going to steal.

Thanks to Gary, who refuses to sleep anywhere without diamond bedsheets.

  • Jenness

    I wonder if they have a clause in it if you stain them how much you have to pay. Imagine having this incredible sexcapade night but then oops Aunt Flo comes and you wake up to that - the horror would be like the severed horse head scene in the Godfather. "My uterus has betrayed us ALL!" eEEK EEEK eeekE EEKK <---scary music as she flips the sheets hahaha

  • heretikeen

    Funny how hard they tried to come up with reasons apart from "BECAUSE NONE OF YOUR FRIENDS HAS DONE THAT!"

  • Xockszky

    and the funny thing is, from a distance they look cheap and gaudy.

  • Enkidu98

    Donald Trumps Dream Sheets -- Pee comes right out, no bleach needed!

  • TheQiwiMan

    Yumm... the decadent scent of a society on the brink of collapse...

  • Frédéric Purenne

    "I'm sorry, but if I have the money to stay in a presidential suite with
    $224,000 bed sheets, my positive feelings are already at max."

    Damn fucking straight! The only way you could sway me for gold bed sheets would be with comfort.

  • Bling Nye

    "Well, we couldn't afford an actual bed after buying the sheets, so we had to put them on this pile of bricks, wood and hay."

  • Munihausen

    But will dried semen come out of it? That is the true question.

  • Meh

    So i wonder how they check whether or not someone takes like part of the sheets. I suppose someone who pays for BS like this doesn't have to but still.

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