You've Got To Be Kidding Me: $1,425 Pre-Destroyed Hightop Sneakers

May 5, 2017

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Hot on the broken heels of those $425 fake mud jeans, these are the $1,425 'Future Destroyed High-Top Sneakers' designed by French luxury fashion house Maison Margiela and available from Neiman Marcus. They look like a pair of shoes a dog ate, then somebody with poor motor skills tried to repair with a stapler. Apparently that's a $1,425 look. Personally, I like looking like a million bucks, but that's just me and I dress to impress. "Isn't that the same shirt you wore yesterday?" Of course not. "Yes it is, I recognize the stains." What if I told you I paid a million dollars for these stains? "I'd remind you I saw you drop that $2 hotdog on yourself yesterday at lunch." For the record though that hotdog did taste like a million bucks.

Keep going for two more shots to fuel your outrage.

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Thanks to Alyssa, who's inspired me to start my own shoe-distressing-by-mail business. "You're just going to give them to your dog for a day then send them back?" Sure, if there's anything left.

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