Candy For Breakfast: Jolly Rancher Pop-Tarts

May 23, 2017


Pop-Tarts: you used to love them when you were a kid. Jolly Ranchers too. Don't you lie to me. And soon you'll be able to relive your cavity-filled youth thanks to limited edition Jolly Rancher flavored Pop-Tarts. They'll be available in cherry, watermelon (the best) and green apple flavors and probably all be equally disgusting and cause stomach bleeding. And I'm not just saying that to prevent people from buying them so I can have them all, but I didn't spread rumors that Girl Scout Cookies cause reproductive harm for no reason.

Thanks to Stephanie B, who's holding out for Starburst flavored Toaster Strudels. I call the icing packets!

  • Bubbubsky

    HOORAY DIABETES! Because who really needs their feet, anyway?

  • TheQiwiMan

    Gross. Will not buy.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I feel like the cherry might not be complete shit. But it might also be.

  • Joel Lamm

    Not to be a downer, but I would drink that Aragog cocktail from the last story before I ate one of these.

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