Japanese Scientists Create Robot Bees To Help Pollinate Flowering Plants

February 15, 2017


Bees: they're all dying. Yet wasps and hornets seem to be doing just fine. WTF Mother Nature, your ass is BACKWARDS. Nobody like a front-butt. Thankfully, scientists in Japan have created small drones to act as pollinators since all the real bees seem to be buying the farm. Did something happen to Old MacDonald?!

The system, described in the journal Chem, is nowhere near ready to be sent to agricultural fields, but it could help pave the way to developing automated pollination techniques at a time when bee colonies are suffering precipitous declines.

In flowering plants, sex often involves a threesome [EDITOR'S NOTE: Please continue in great detail]. Flowers looking to get the pollen from their male parts into another bloom's female parts need an envoy to carry it from one to the other. Those third players are animals known as pollinators -- a diverse group of critters that includes bees, butterflies, birds and bats, among others.

Animal pollinators are needed for the reproduction of 90% of flowering plants and one third of human food crops, according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture's Natural Resources Conservation Service. Chief among those are bees -- but many bee populations in the United States have been in steep decline in recent decades, likely due to a combination of factors, including agricultural chemicals, invasive species and climate change. Just last month, the rusty patched bumblebee became the first wild bee in the United States to be listed as an endangered species.

Basically these drones (seen above, upside-down) use a combination what what appears to be hair gathered from my shower drain (actually horsehair) and a sticky gel to gather pollen from a male plant, then deposit said pollen into the lady parts of a female plant. Quite simple biology really, I remember learning about that in middle school science class. I also remember yelling 'PLANTS HAVE PENISES!' and repeatedly hitting myself in the head with a textbook until I fell out of my desk. I've always been an entertainer.

Thanks to TittyMcNippleFondler, hands down my favorite secret menu item at McDonald's.

  • We all know that science always helps the agriculture side but this one is really impressed us like no one even imagine about it before.

  • Bertw192

    This drone comes complete with it's own landing strip

  • Bling Nye


  • The_Wretched

    Helpful guidance if you should find one at night in the dark.

  • Bling Nye

    "...at night in the dark."

    Approved by The Redundancy Department of Redundancy's Redundancy Approval Department of Approval for Redundancies.

  • somebody did not watch the third season of black mirror...

  • GeneralDisorder

    You mean the one where a bunch of people get blackmailed into doing stupid stuff?

  • Mr. Roboto

    I remember that episode. I think it ended with all of the flowers being happily polenated and nobody dying.

  • PUNX

    are drones really needed to do this or can it all be done by hand? is this a excuse for someone just to play around with a drone and call it a job?

  • The Magnificent Newtboy

    It would take an enormous amount of time, money and people to do it by hand. If they had the programming right a little fleet of these buggers could do the job superfast and with iron logic dictating the most efficient routes etc. ALL HAIL THE ROBOBEES.

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