Epic Battle Simulation Of 11,000 Penguins Vs 4,000 Santas

December 19, 2016


This is a video demonstration of Epic Battle Simulator, a video game based on gigantic armies fighting each other. In this case, a bloody battle between 11,000 penguins and 4,000 Santas. Who wins? SPOILER: the penguins. Although to the Santa's army credit, there were outnumbered 2.75 to 1. It's kind of like that movie 300 except I never watched that movie, and, if we're being honest (which I am in a last ditch effort to get on Santa's nice list), I didn't watch all of this either. I did skip around though to see if there were any scenes from p0rno movies spliced in between shots. SPOILER: They blew it.

Keep going for the video as well as the official trailer for the game.

Thanks to Tam, who agrees 300 polar bears could have easily destroyed both armies.

  • I think the penguins' strategy of high ground+bottle neck was the key. Reverse those positions and it's Santas all day.

  • event

    Seemed like attack speed and range of attack as well with the bottleneck helping with CQC. Those unwieldy canes had nothing on them sharp beaks.

  • MustacheHam

    If the video had an announcer voice:

    "Beloved Icons from the North Pole Saint Nick vs. Penguins of the South Pole battle to the death in mass numbers."
    *few minutes later*
    "Victor: Penguins of theeee South Poooooolllleee!!!"

  • TheQiwiMan

    This. This is why I don't celebrate Christmas.

    I celebrate Festivus.

  • Andyman7714

    So if a penguin pecks you once or lands on you, you're dead? What is this, the Kobayashi Maru test for Santas?

  • Doog

    That last Santa was a coward and never should have been allowed on the battle field, though to be fair after seeing 3,999 of your (clones?) die and hearing at least that many murderous and suicidal penguins coming towards you I suppose not running to your sleigh could be considered courageous.

    I suppose the take away is that Candy Canes don't make great weapons.

  • 😆😄

    The way the camera man moves around is nauseating...

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