These are the elf ear headphones available from Taobao. They cost around $14, use a standard 3.5mm audio jack, and make it look like you have elf ears. And you know how I feel about elf ears. "You love them." I really do. "What about a boxer's cauliflower ears?" Jesus, can't you see I'm eating? "No." Oh...right. Well I'm eating. "When are you going to be done?" Listen: when it comes to you saying something nasty, just assume I'm never not eating. *grabs a handful of Funyuns from the bowl I made with the bottom of my shirt* That's pretty accurate anyways.
Keep going for several more shots including what they look like not in ears.
Thanks to Tabitha, who wears elf ear earbuds and listens to songs from The Legend Of Zelda series because it's the right thing to do.