This is the Piggyback Driver, a helmet with handlebars for giving kids piggyback/shoulderback rides so they don't put their arms around your neck and choke you out. The handlebars swivel left and right and light up flashing turn signals indicating which direction your kid wants to go. It also has a horn button for warning slow-walkers in front of you, as well as a turbo button for when your child wants you to go faster. I always want to go faster. That's why whenever I get a piggyback ride I wear spurs. Plus swing a battle axe. Now bend over, you're my new war mount. *digs spurs into ribs* Giddyup, to Old MacDonald's! Jk jk, new McDonald's I've been craving all day breakfast.
Keep going for a video.
Thanks to Davey W, who promised me a piggyback ride but then collapsed under my weight. I can't tell if he's still breathing.