Maybe Prayers Do Get Answered: General Mills Girl Scout Cookie Cereal

October 26, 2016


Despite what Wheaties might have you believe, all cereals are actually the breakfast of champions. Personally, I've been on a Madagascar S'mores Jungle Party kick for the past few months and I've never felt like I could win a sports contest more in my life. Probably only a competitive cereal eating competition though. You know how Cap'n Crunch destroys the roof of your mouth? I have a titanium mouth roof implant now. I'm like Jaws from James Bond except not nearly as strong or good looking. General Mills and the Girl Scouts have teamed up to release two new Girl Scout Cookie inspired cereals this January: Caramel Crunch (inspired by Samoas) and Thin Mints. Obviously, they come at the perfect time to admit that New Year's Resolution wasn't going to happen anyways.

Thanks to Mary Ann, who agrees a bowl of chocolate cereal made with whole chocolate milk is as close to heaven as you can get without dying.

  • Ghost Pirates

    There goes my diabetes again.

  • asdfadfs

    ah, the delicious taste of loopholes in child labor laws and taking advantage of a young girl's need to belong by guilting coworkers and neighbors into making an order.

    these cookies are basically a pyramid scam 'inverted funnel' business opportunity

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