Dot-Matrix Toaster Can Toast Whatever You Want On Your Bread

August 10, 2016


This is a Kickstarter for the $85 Toaseroid toaster, a smartphone app controlled toaster that uses a dot-matrix grid of microfilaments to let you toast whatever you want on your bread (within small dot-matrix grid reason). You can also fine-tune the level of brownness. Not feeling creative? No worries, the toaster can also automatically toast the weather forecast, or text messages from a friend or lover. Obviously, my toast is going to be nothing but penises and dirty words from here on out. *opens crumpled brown lunch bag at work, coworker sits beside me at break-room table* "Hey GW, what you got for lunch today?" *flashes 'F*CK OFF' tuna salad sandwich* Man, that's gonna be the highlight of my month.

Keep going for a couple more shots and the Kickstarter video.



Thanks to JD, who still toasts his bread the old fashioned way: over a campfire and as quick as possible before the bears smell and coming looking for a free snack.

  • archer923

    Why hasn't Nintendo given out 40 C&D on this product. Since it's showing a Pikachu and pokeball.

  • Bling Nye

    You know what I want? For my "toast" to be mostly just bread, with just a few pixilated areas of toast in it. Oh, that's what this does? I'll take 12.

  • It's cheaper than that $600 Cylon toaster...

    Oops, $100 dollar...

  • Bubbubsky


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