Jackasses Ignite Entire Fireworks Display At Wal-Mart

June 20, 2016


Nice, and right by the end-cap of lighter fluid.

This is a video of an entire fireworks display at Wal-Mart going off because two jackasses set it on fire. Now I love fire and fireworks as much as the next man who wishes he had giant Roman candles for arms, but you can't go around lightning fireworks displays in public all willy-nilly. There's a certain code to arson.

Thankfully the suspects were caught on video by the store's surveillance cameras. The Walmart was evacuated before anyone was hurt, and local responders were able to contain the fire and explosives before they spread to the rest of the store. Despite the outcome, when arrested the two suspects might face upwards of 20 years in prison since this crime could be classified as a class two felony, which is just below a murder charge in severity.

Damn, up to 20 years in prison? That's pretty serious. I guess you better think twice before lighting a Wal-Mart fireworks display on fire. "I'd still do it." Then maybe you better think three times. "I'd still do it." Four times? "Still." Somebody arrest this person before they hurt somebody. And make sure to pat them down for matches and lighters.

Keep going for the video.

Thanks to LilRyan, who's only allowed to to buy those little black snake fireworks. Oh, and Snap-And-Pops.

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