These are the A&W Root Beer and Orange Crush flavored Pop-Tarts that are a real thing because vomiting on your way to work is all the rage. I doubt I'll ever try them even when they have the orange Manger's Special sticker on them when they're trying to get rid of them at the grocery store because who the hell is going to buy these things. "Honey, look what I got you from the store today." Awwwww, I love you, mom. I bet these are gonna be great.
Thanks again to Allyson S, who's holding out for Mountain Dew Code Red Pop-Tarts because she knows what's up.