Because cats already have 3-D printed, leather and metal armor available, this is an example of the aluminum battle armor Etsy shop Lebovskiart makes for dogs. This particular armor was made for a 20kg (~45-pound) dog, but they will make custom armor for any size dog (starting around $365), and, if you ask really nice, maybe even a small pig. Not a duck though, I already emailed to check for you. It's crazy how well I can predict your needs. That's why I think I'd make such a great personal assistant. You do have a duck, don't you? "No." I quit. When I was in college I lived in an apartment complex that had a little pond in the middle and there was this duck and goose that were best friends and always hung out together. They were never NOT together. On weekends we'd set up folding chairs in the parking lot and drink beer and watch them for hours. Those were the days. These days? The end times. Seriously, just watch the news, any of it. It looks like God's little experiment is coming to an end.
Keep going for a couple more shots while I ready my catapult.
Thanks to hairless, who agrees there should be a day at the dog park where everybody dresses their dogs up in battle armor and build little cardboard castles and take pictures.