I Need A Sugar Mama, STAT: Near Complete Stegosaurus Skeleton Up For Auction

May 24, 2016


This is the 150-million year old (how? the earth isn't even that old!) Stegosaurus skeleton going up for auction this weekend. The skeleton is 5.7-meters (~16-feet) in length and over 90% complete. Bidding starts around $1.3-million but the bones are expected to fetch a price around double that. Damn, that is money I don't have. Maybe one of you would like to buy it for me? I could pay you back in housekeeping services or something. Granted I'm not very good at cleaning, but I am willing to bend over in a French maid outfit as much as you'd like. Maybe give you a little peek of my...you know. "The dinosaur bone sticking out of your ass?" Don't act like you aren't into this. You're rich, regular fetish stuff doesn't get you off anymore.

Keep going for a bunch more shots of the newest addition to my grand foyer.










Thanks to vishal, who tried to sell me a dinosaur skeleton that looks suspiciously like an ostrich. There's even still some meat on the bones. I'll take it.

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