I Am Into This: Tailgater's Tow-Hitch Double Hammock

May 10, 2016


Because every product should be available as a tow-hitch attachment (I'm looking at you, tow-hitch stripper pole), this is the Tailgater's Dual Hammock available from *jumps out of cake yelling SURPRISE and gyrating in banana hammock* Hammacher Schlemmer. The unit costs $350, which, as far as Hammacher Schlemmer products go, is practically free. Each hammock comes with a footrest so your legs don't fall asleep or develop varicose veins and can support up to 250-pounds. So basically at the beginning of a football tailgate it could support me, but by the end I'd break it. If you think I can't put 30 pounds of BBQ and beer inside me in one afternoon you are sorely mistaken. Also, look at that couple in the picture. Is this a screencap from a Viagra commercial or what? Where are their kayaks?

Thanks to Douglass, who agrees that would be awesome to sit in while doing 65MPH down the interstate which they didn't say you couldn't do so let's do it and sue when one or both of us dies.

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