Doodie! Doodie!: Finally, A Smiling Poop Emoji Pool Float

May 18, 2016

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"So, this is my life." -- that model

Doodie was a reference to the pool scene in Caddyshack by the way, just so we're clear. This is the $20 smiling poop emoji pool float available on Amazon. Get a bunch of them and fill your pool with turds. That's a pretty awkward size and shape for a pool float. I'm not sure that thing could support Rose OR Jack if the Titanic was sinking. I guess it could be good for kids though. Kids love poop. Have I ever told you about the time I found a cat turd in the playground sandbox when I was a kid? I rolled it around and around in the sand pretending I was a dung beetle until a teacher saw what I was doing and took me by the arm and led me to the bathroom and made me wash my hands three times. I guess she didn't bother to have the sandbox cleaned though, because the same turd was still there the next day. You can imagine what I did. "Played dung beetle again?" Put it in my pocket to take home.

Keep going for one more shot of this model's big break.

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Thanks to Anne, who's holding out for a pool float of the eye rolling emoji. Oh man, I use that one all the time. Honestly, that's pretty much all I text anyone anymore.

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