Awww: 9-Year Old Gets Pokemon Card Collection Stolen, Cop Gives Him His Collection

May 25, 2016

stolen-pokemon-collection-happy-ending.jpg

9-year old Bryce got his binder of Pokemon cards stolen while walking to a friend's house to trade. Apparently some little jerk a couple years older just ran up and snatched the binder and ran. Bryce's mom called the cops and 26-year old Cleveland police officer James Grotenrath and his partner Ken Kirk responded. Then, after finishing his shift that day, Grotenrath returned to Bryce and gave him his own extensive Pokemon card collection, including a rare, banned card. Now just a minute while I hide all my Star Wars action figures then report a robbery and pray the responding officer also collects Star Wars action figures.

"I grew up with Pokemon, I loved Pokemon as a kid and I would be heartbroken too if my cards were taken from me," Grotenrath said.


[On the rare card he gave Bryce] "It's a banned card of Pokeman and there's only about ten of these in the world and I have one of them," explained Bryce.

"It's a priceless item, but it's better to see someone else smile, and in my book, like my partner says, it's just happy to see a citizen smile instead of always frowning upon us and looking the other way," said Grotenrath.

In even more happy news, police were able to locate the kid who stole Bryce's collection and secure the binder, although several cards were already missing. Police gave the thief a stern "talking to" but didn't file any charges because why not let this kid grow up to be a dirty thief? I would have scared that little shit straight. YOU WANT TO GO TO PRISON, BOY? YOU KNOW WHAT THEY'LL DO TO YOU IN THERE? THEY'LL CHEW YOU UP LIKE A DOG BONE. THEN HACK FOR AWHILE BEFORE COUGHING UP LITTLE PIECES OF YOU ONTO THE CARPET AND RE-CHEWING THEM. "You are sure you aren't being a little rough on him?" Ma'am, please, I'm doing my job. Maybe if you weren't raising such a turd I wouldn't have to be here. "But--" WOOF! WOOF!

Keep going for a video news report.

Thanks to Friedman, who's never had anything taken from him that he hasn't gotten returned because he's Liam Neeson.

  • JimmyThr

    So...Instead of doing his Job and getting the kid's actual collection back he just gives him his own, that's like me reporting that someone robbed a bunch of money from me, and the cop just goes "well it'd be a lot of trouble to find whoever stole your money, but here's a bunch of my money, it's a bunch of outdated Taiwanese money but i'm sure you'll do fine"

  • rjackparis

    really? noone is going to comment on the ancient mew card?

    they gave those away at a screening of pokemon.

  • I have two in my binder still which means I 20% of them in existence. Bow to me.

  • TheQiwiMan

    Oh hey, it's cool that these guys regularly ruin peoples' lives if they have a small amount of plant matter in their pocket that the government forbids you to have, kidnapping them and locking them in jail for years and ruining their prospects of getting decent jobs after the years (or sometimes decades) of their lives are stolen from them. And it's cool that they regularly pull over people for non-crimes like expired tags or going slightly faster than some jag-off bureaucrats think you should and extorting money from them, all while pretending to give a shit about 'serving and protecting' the public..... because this pig gave a kid some Pokemon cards.

    Fuck the police.

    And fuck the Stockholm Syndrome Sheep that look at these brainless thugs with anything less than the contempt that they deserve.

    (And now to gleefully await the waves of butt-hurt mouth-breathers' angry replies. Come at me, bro.)

  • TheOtakuX

    Eh. Speed limits are a good thing, but I agree with you on the rest.

  • TheQiwiMan

    I used to think that too. I'd encourage you to look into that claim, you'd be surprised. There is ample evidence that speed limits are nothing more than 'security theater', gives us the illusion that they have something to do with safety, but that's not actually backed up by any evidence.

    https://www.ibiblio.org/rdu...

    If you don't have the time to read the entire thing, the summary is this: "Lowering speed limits below the 50th percentile does not reduce accidents, but does significantly increase driver violations of the speed limit. Conversely, raising the posted speed limits did not increase speeds or accidents."

    Weird, it's almost as if people already have a vested interest in driving safely, you know, so they don't die. And the people that violate the speed limit would violate it regardless of whatever numbers are on the signs.

    So if speed limits have zero evidence of producing a shred of safety, why do we keep them around?

    "Assuming an average ticket cost of $150.00, the total up front profit from tickets ranges from 3.75 to 7.5 billion dollars " -ANNUALLY. Just another way for the road pirates to rob you (you know, to keep you safe from... road pirates)

    Sorry friend, but Santa Claus isn't real either. :-P

  • palpable ovaltine

    You're neglecting something important. Yes, the number of accidents remains about the same. Fatalities and serious injuries, however, go down vastly when you reduce the speed limit. Speed limits are usually set for what's safe for that road anyway, so people who drive for the road aren't likely to be impacted much. But you absolutely know that with no speed limit there would be some jackasses going way faster than they should specifically because they could.

    And honestly, you seem to be the most butt-hurt person here, possibly in existence. Sorry the cops took your stash bro, gnash those teeth a little harder.

  • TheQiwiMan

    LOL yes, keep feeding me, butt-hurt little sheep, I love it! :-D

    (I don't smoke weed because I'm not a fucking loser, still doesn't make it right that these scumbags throw people in jail that do.)

    Keep it comin', little animals, keep trying to refute facts with your hurt little feelsies, it makes me so wet! :-D

  • palpable ovaltine

    So this is the point of the conversation where you've discovered your opinion is not supported, and rather than capitulate, pretend that you are trolling?
    Okay.

  • TheQiwiMan

    When I see a real philosophical argument being made that can be supported by things like facts, reason, evidence, then I'll debate you. All I see is butt hurt feelsies coming from you. Want a big boy answer? Start using your big boy words. Kthanxbai

  • palpable ovaltine

    Do you want a real argument or a philosophical one? Those are two different things.

    You've already been given evidence, facts, and reason. You chose to ignore them because it doesn't fit your narrative of "cops=bad". Higher speed collisions result in more serious injuries and fatalities. That's a fact of life, and of physics.

    Cops don't make the drug laws you're whining about. That is also a fact. If you have a problem with drug laws, take it up with lawmakers as Hayley suggested. I live in a state where weed is legal, and I voted to make it so. I don't, however, cry like a child when a cop arrests someone for breaking a law, because that's their job.

    If you were talking about profiling or excessive force you may have an actual point. As is, you're just a petulant child.

  • TheQiwiMan

    Cry moar

  • palpable ovaltine

    Irony.

  • Dave in Texas

    It's all so simple...play by the rules. Lesson taught in kindergarten, but some refuse to believe that simple things like rules apply to them. If you are one of those, you get caught, you pay. Don't wish to pay? Play by the rules. Your argument that "the rules are stupid" is completely invalid. Now take your ball and go home...

  • TheQiwiMan

    Lol wow, what an obedient little slave. I hope you keep your chains nice and polished for your masters like a good little boy.

    "It's all so simple... Give the control over your life to others." I have no problem with rules that are arrived at by consent. I have a BIG problem with disinterested third parties who decide the rules without my consent, especially when the "rules" are nothing but an excuse to extort money from people.

    Some people just ache for slavery. You might get off on being a submissive little bitch, fine, but don't try to force your ignorance on others, thanks.

  • Dave in Texas

    I suggest you climb out from behind your safe, secure keyboard where you are Master Supreme of Your Domain and get involved with life and the rule makers just might actually make you privy to why the rules are what they are. Just because you don't understand why the rules are made, or agree with them doesn't mean there are not good reasons for them. Try running for a School Board position, or a City Council position, then you can become one of the slave owners instead of a whiney-assed bitch behind a keyboard. You obviously already play by "Their" rules, now...pay taxes, pay your bills, don't murder at your discretion, register your vehicle, have insurance, etc...you just object to the rules you feel shouldn't apply to you. Google "petulant child" and then look in the mirror.

  • TheQiwiMan

    LOL how far up a cop's ass do you regularly shove your smiling face? Up to the ears? Sounds like it's at least up to the ears.

    :-D

  • Dave in Texas

    THATS your best? What? Are you like 12 or something....thought I was having a discussion with an adult. My bad...you're excused...go back to your video games and mac n cheese now.

  • Hayley Prychun Rodgers

    Really, because drive 45 past a school is a good idea? Or that guy who likes to fly through our neighbor hood at 45 (it's 25) isn't endangering anyone? What a load of bull. It is about reaction time and the amount of damaged caused. Hit a kid going 25 they might survive, hit them going 45 and you're likely to have a skid mark.

    Also, if you have a problem with the laws, take that up with law makers. Police don't make the laws, they enforce them. And anyone so stupid as to think that all cops are evil because they do their damn job is "butt-hurt mouth-breather" not the people who actually THINK before spewing.

  • dartanian300

    Several of those are Yu-Gi-Oh cards...

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