Everything's Bigger In Texas: Bowie, Texas Builds The World's Largest Bowie Knife

April 12, 2016

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This is the world's largest Bowie knife, recently constructed by the town of Bowie, Texas to honor Colonel David James Bowie, who died during the Battle Of The Alamo, and for whom the town was named. No word if it's big enough for Crocodile Dundee to consider a real knife.

the knife is 20 feet long and has has wood handle made from a local tree. The blade is 14 feet, 5 inches long and weighs 3,000 pounds.

That's right -- it's an actual giant knife, not just a model of one. I wonder how long before Paul Bunyon hears about the thing and comes to claim it as his own. *thunderous hoof-steps* Uh-oh, sounds like Paul and Babe The Blue Ox are already on their way! Positions, everyone! "For battle?" What? No, I want us to all line up so we look like a penis if somebody makes a video with a drone.

Keep going for a couple more shots.

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Thanks to YouCan'tMakeMe, who's right, I can't. But I can send you to bed with no dessert.

  • The Magnificent Newtboy

    Just in time to make a Crocodile Dundee remake!

  • GeneralDisorder

    I do wonder why they patterned this one after the cheapo Pakistani knock-off. I don't think anyone really knows what the original Bowie knife looked like but I'd bet it was nothing like that one.

  • dougfunnay

    aaah texas home of the overcompensating half retarded geriatrics
    military contracts and oil money woooooo!

    and before you rag on texas just realize without a texas these people could be living by you!

  • da1nonlysage

    Last part was very reassuring! Thanks!

  • TheQiwiMan

    The angle they are leaving it... I am having anxiety attacks here..

  • palpable ovaltine

    The crowd is clearly overwhelmed by excitement.

  • Geekologie

    I'm pretty sure that one old lady in green just had her mind blown. Plus looks like Professor Farnsworth.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I'll be in my angry dome!

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