If Only It Were That Easy: Rays Jumping Out Of The Water And Bellyflopping To Attract Mates

April 26, 2016


LOL those stupid rays think they're birds!

This is a video from the BBC of a group of Mobula rays jumping out of the ocean to bellyflop in an attempt to attract a mate. Both males and females participate, trying to draw attention to themselves and their superior sexability. Personally, I have never bellyflopped to try to attract a mate before, but one summer I did do a cannonball at the pool to impress a girl I liked. It was such a glorious cannonball. So glorious it soaked her and all her friends who were tanning and she told me she hated me. So that backfired. It was a very lonely, loveless summer. Come to think of it, they've all been. It's cool, I'm fine. *crying*

Keep going for the video.

Thanks to Danielle, who claims she once saw a ray actually learn how to fly and build a nest in a palm tree.

  • Mr. K

    Majestic Sea Flap Flap. Much Pretty!

  • Frédéric Purenne

    I wish they'd show some jumps that weren't slowed down.

  • The Magnificent Newtboy

    Yeah I agree.

  • Alamander

    Attract mates, huh? The ol' 'Flop through the skylight at a slumber party' trick. You're supposed to outgrow that in middle school, ya dumb rays.

  • TheQiwiMan

    And here I thought the best way to attract a mate was my crippling porn addiction and typing ethnic slurs in all caps in YouTube comments.... :-(

  • GristleMcNerd

    No no, that's the best way to attract HATE. Big difference.

  • Jenness


  • ToyBoxofGuns

    I'd fuck 'em.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I believe there are trademarks that would be a problem if you tried to use the name crocodile humper but Ray Humper... pretty safe.

  • The_Wretched

    Proof positive that the Great Old Ones are real.

  • The_Wretched

    "to infinity and beyond!"

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