Needle To The Vein: GO CUBES, Chewable Coffee Bites

March 1, 2016

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These are GO CUBES, soft chewable coffee bites manufactured by San Francisco based company Nootrobox. The bites come in mocha, pure drip and latte flavors and each package (4 squares, 50mg of caffeine per square) contains the equivalent of two cups of coffee. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? "Jamming a four-pack up your butt during your morning shower?" Great minds think alike.

We've reinvented coffee. We've combined the research and precision behind Nootrobox with the deliciousness of coffee to create a scientifically delicious product engineered for performance. ...In addition to caffeine,GO CUBES contain precise amounts of other safe, effective supplements like L-theanine, B6, and methylated B12 that improve caffeine for enhanced focus & clarity.

Ahahahahhahaha @ "scientifically delicious." Is that even possible? Can you scientifically prove something is delicious? Because I think olives are delicious but other people hate them. You know what IS scientifically delicious? Margaritas. Margaritas are scientifically delicious and anybody who disagrees is wrong and shouldn't be allowed to science ever again. Not even with one of those rinky-dink children's chemistry sets.

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