So, It's Come To This: Real Star Wars Printed Condoms

December 16, 2015


These are real Star Wars condoms (previously: these conceptual ones) you can order from Graphic Armor, a company that specializes in custom condom printing and not knight's armor painted with butts and penises like I imagined in my mind. So like, the actual condom you put on your wiener really has a quote on it and a picture of Vader or Yoda. Granted it's probably not going to look so clear when it's on your wiener, but you only have your wiener to blame for that. At least Yoda will look shriveled and lifelike. The text will probably look like wingdings. I want one custom printed to make my penis look like a lightsaber. *swinging green lightsaber around so it slaps my legs* Hey honey, ever been with a Jedi? "I'm going to bed." I don't blame you. But seriously you haven't ever been with a Jedi though, right? I can't compete with that.

Thanks to Adam, who made a joke about how being a Star Wars superfan is probably contraception enough. REAL MATURE, ADAM. Way to lose friends.

  • dlb

    Luke, I ain't your daddy.

  • dlb

    Will I do, fit it better.

  • Barry Tabrah

    Han shot first

  • Oh gee!
    He's going to buy some of these and expect me to find them amusing.
    I don't want Yoda in my clown-hole.

  • I think that pretty much sums it up. http://www.tombstonebuilder...

  • That is beautiful.

    You spelt my name wrong.

  • The_Wretched

    He's a swamp dweller.

  • Andyman7714

    May the force be contained and thrown away at your leisure.

  • dlb


  • Ollie Williams

    Cease and desist letter from Disney in 3... 2... 1...

  • Meh

    Starwars related crap.

  • Guesticle

    it'll still be impressive when I wear one and its just yoda saying "try" right?

  • Jenness

    Only if you are sobbing uncontrollably while muttering "I can't believe it's finally going to happen this time." Then that would be impressive - but probably not on the scale you are intending.

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