This is the 1,200-year old viking sword that hiker Goran Olsen found while hiking in Norway. Experts say that thanks to the extremely cold and dry conditions it was found in, that it's in amazingly good shape. When the winter snow melts, they hope to be able to better search the area and see if there's any other treasure lying around. Obviously, I plan to beat them to it, and keep the treasure for myself because I am like Indiana Jones but with a ton of gambling debt.
The two-and-a-half foot blade probably dates from about 750 to 800 A.D., and was likely used by vikings of the day. The sword was found in such unusually good condition, that experts say if you polished it up enough and outfitted it with a new grip, it could actually be used as a weapon over a millennium later.
Well of course it could still be used as a weapon. It's a sword, not a feather. I don't care how old a sword is, I don't want to get hit with it. Unless it's a balloon sword, in which case go for it. But only on the buttcheeks, and you have to call me Prince Tenderbottom while you do it. "Wait -- what?!" I said I'm the most fearsome warrior in all the land.
Keep going for one more shot of my future blade.