US Parents Naming Their Kids After Guns Is On The Rise

September 4, 2015

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Because a lot of the people having kids are the ones who shouldn't be redneck yokels, there has been a significant increase in the number of children born in the US being named after guns. Obviously, I am going to name my firstborn Laser Blaster Pew Pew, especially if it's a girl.

Most popular of all is Gunner, which was given to more than 1,500 babies in the US last year.


Lance is an old-school choice, but has been increasingly joined by Mace, Blade, Saw and Dagger...

Also on the rise in the US - a nation which has seen significant gun violence this year - for baby boys are Trigger, Shooter, Caliber, Magnum and Pistol. There has also been a rise in the use of gun manufacturers such as Barrett, Remington, Kimber, Ruger, Wesson, Browning, Benelli and Beretta.

Meanwhile, five little boys were named Danger last year. Even blunter were the 11 named Arson and nine called Chaos.

Arson? Chaos? Blade? Saw? Dagger? That is kind of mindblowing. I want to meet the parents that are naming their kids these things. And then-- "Sterilize them?" What? No. I was gonna say ask them to give me a cool nickname.

Thanks to MMMmartin, whose name I said in my mind like I just ate a delicious bite of something.

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