Oh My: Adult Toy For Depositing Alien Eggs In Yourself

August 13, 2015

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This is the Splorch ovipositor sex toy from Primal Hardwere. It was designed to resemble an alien or insect's egg-laying organ and used to squeeze homemade gelatin eggs into your own holes (eggs are inserted into the rear of the toy and massaged forward). It is probably not the best thing to eat deviled eggs out of at my neighbor's next cookout, but that will not stop me. Admittedly, I've heard of some pretty freaky-deaky fetishes before, but this? This is completely normal. Seriously, what's wrong with this? SPOILER: Absolutely nothing beside the fact it should come with a warning that you're not supposed to use it with plastic Easter eggs or if you do you should at least tape the two halves together because there is a situation in my ass right now and I'm supposed to be at the dentist in 25 minutes.

Keep going for a video demo of an egg being laid that is probably NSFW.

Thanks to Fifi, who agrees with the right combination of crop-circle designs you could probably get real aliens to come down here and deposit some eggs in your keister.

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