Man May Have To Get Hand Amputated After Trying To Pick Up Rattlesnake To Take A Selfie

August 27, 2015


In completely unsurprising news, 36-year old Alex Gomez may lose his hand after attempting to pick up a rattlesnake to take a selfie with near his Lake Elsinore, California home. I wish this happened to more people who tried to take ridiculous selfies. Thankfully, Alex's mom is here to talk some sense.

"It could've bit his neck, and that would have been it. That's just being a fool," Alex's mother Deborah said to CBS Los Angeles.

Alex's mother says her son is embarrassed. But still, Deborah isn't being easy on her son for the decision to pick the snake up.

"I told him the news people had been calling, and he said 'Mom, you better not', and I said 'I'm going to'. I'm going to teach him a real good lesson when he gets home. No mercy for him."

Man, what an idiot. It's hard to believe that with Deborah's clearly exceptional parenting skills that Alex grew up to be a man that would think taking a selfie with a rattlesnake is a good idea, yet here we are. This is a great time to discuss the nature vs. nurture debate. Just kidding, this is a great time to crack open a beer and zone out watching me play video games.

Thanks to Simon, who I always ignore whenever he says to do something. YOU DON'T CONTROL ME, SIMON.

  • Ren

    Now he can get a neato 3d printed hand

  • Michael Jones

    Guy has a neck tattoo so he's an idiot to begin with.

  • G-man

    Was that his selfie hand?

  • Meh

    Darwin awards. Lets all encourage morons like this to keep doing stupid things like this, so one day the human species might accomplish something.

  • GeneralDisorder

    Dude's 36. If he hasn't passed on his genes yet it's pretty much unlikely. I would never want to be a 50 something year old "new father". I had my kids young so I can die whenever I want. Well, that came out wrong but I'm leaving it.

  • Gene Kaufman

    Now that, that my friends is the face of regret. Pure and unadulterated regret.
    I sincerely hope it goes well for him.

  • dougfunnay

    i doubt hell lose his hand but he probably should
    -"It was rattling," his nephew said. "It was pretty mad."-
    fucking idiot

  • Bling Nye

    Well, he wanted a bad ass selfie (is there such a thing, really?) but now he's got a bad ass amputee story. Assuming he doesn't mention trying to pick up the rattle snake for a selfie and instead goes with the "true" version of events which involved him saving three orphaned baby goats by fighting off a gang of Harley riding honey badgers wielding rattle snakes as whips.

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