Back In The Water!: Walking Fish May Invade Australia

June 9, 2015

walking-fish.jpg

Apparently the climbing perch, which is indigenous to south-east Asia, heard Australia is the place to be if you're a f***ing weird-ass or terrifying animal, and wildlife authorities are worried the fish may invade the country and ruin everything. EVERYTHING.

the fish uses the strong spines on its pectoral fins to essentially "walk" across dry land from waterhole to waterhole.


According to a James Cook University report, the fish has an "accessory air-breathing organ" on its dorsal area, allowing it to live on dry land for up to six days. Extremely hardy, they are even thought to hibernate in mud and wait for water to return.

The climbing perch is aggressive and is a threat to native fish, birds and turtles. If eaten, the perch's spiky fins can be splayed out, lodging in the throat or stomach of their predator and killing them. The fish has even been observed killing pelicans and cormorants by swelling up in their throats and choking them to death, according to the report.

Wait -- a fish that can live on dry land for six days? That is some WACKY SHIT. *presses intercom button* Mother Nature, can you come in here please? *tree woman enters room* Mother Nature! What happened to your arms?! "Somebody cut them off for firewood." That's awful! Just awful. Can I build a treehouse on your head?

Keep going for a brief video of the fish doing its thing.

Thanks to ButteredPancake, although I'm still more of a waffle guy.

  • Javier Aranda

    You call that walking ? pff

  • KLanD

    You see that video.. You see that video right there?

    THAT is the biggest "Fuck You!" to creationism I've ever seen.

    Dude.. end of story, Evolution FTW.

  • shashi

    Stewart Lee on Paul Nuttall on Fish on land https://youtu.be/3HMhWB95ld... (contains strong language)

  • TheDR

    General Mladic has let himself go.

  • shashi

    He looks like a toby jug filled with hot piss

  • Metacomet

    "Wah, this creature is trying to transition to it's next natural evolutionary state, and that's not exactly according to OUR plans so we need to DO something about this."

    Fuck off, Australia.

  • Guest

    calling the fish invasive or illegal is prejudicial

    call them dreamer fish. thats nice and neutral

  • David

    So Australia is declaring war on fish.

  • TheQiwiMan

    Meh, I'll be impressed once that little guy starts playing soccer.

    (And then grows bored and stops playing soccer, cuz even a little tardo fish realizes what a boring waste of time soccer is)

  • They may? I didn't know they needed permission.

  • Edward

    Someone's late to the evolution party...

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