Canada Urges Citizens To Stop 'Spocking' Their $5 Bills

March 4, 2015


Following Leonard Nimoy's death last week, the Bank of Canada is urging citizens to stop drawing on their $5 bills to make seventh Canadian prime minister Sir Wilfrid Laurier look more like Spock, despite it being an obvious improvement. YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

Contrary to what many believe, the Bank of Canada said Monday it's not illegal to deface or even mutilate banknotes, although there are laws that prohibit reproducing both sides of a current bill electronically.

Nonetheless, bank spokeswoman Josianne Menard pointed out there are reasons to resist the urge to scribble on bills.

"The Bank of Canada feels that writing and markings on bank notes are inappropriate as they are a symbol of our country and a source of national pride," Menard wrote in an email.

Long life and prosperity might also take a hit: Menard said disfigured bills may not circulate for as long and risk being rejected by retailers.

Yeah, no retailer is going to reject a $5 that has Spock drawn on it. It's still legal tender. These? These are chicken tenders, and I WISH I had some dipping sauce. Ranch specifically, but I wouldn't complain if you hit me with some honey BBQ. *sipping milkshake* I'm getting fat.

Thanks to Greg C, who always adds a B and R to the back of $1's to spell BONER. Classic.

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